SiLeO
2007-11-12 |  | Take the time to read |  |
When my Friend and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up my car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver`s side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the technician, "Its open!" His reply, "I know - I already got that side." This was at the Ford dealership in Canton, Mississippi!
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The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it`s safe to cross the street. I was crossing with a coworker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, "What on earth are blind people doing driving?!" She was a probation officer in Wichita, KS
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I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?" To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?" He smiled knowingly and nodded, "That`s why we ask."
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I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road. The reason: "Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don`t think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.
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Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them so much.
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If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
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When everything`s coming your way, you`re in the wrong lane. |
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SiLeO
99+ day(s) ago | lol
o no the whole world is going to end because you lost 5 min |
sawatdee
99+ day(s) ago | Oh no, Ill never get back my 5 mins reading this, LoL |
theunforgiven
99+ day(s) ago | haha... is it painted red in a few spot`s? |
Travvivian
99+ day(s) ago | This one is real. My friend apparently saw it on Ebay:
Up for auction. One WW2 era, French Carbine. Excellent condition, never fired, dropped once. XD |
OhMyGod
99+ day(s) ago | i`ve read them b4 lol, but there great :P
just read the hole lot, still makes me laugh |
SiLeO
99+ day(s) ago | Thanks |
theunforgiven
99+ day(s) ago | haha these are sweet SileO!!!.... |
ThEpAkIsTaNIeMpIrE
99+ day(s) ago | never argue with a fool u may be the fool |
SiLeO
99+ day(s) ago | This to help people Pass the time |
SiLeO
99+ day(s) ago | When you`re right, no one remembers. When you`re wrong, no one forgets.
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Cheer up, the worst is yet to come.
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Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.
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Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make mistakes when nobody is looking.
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They say hard work never hurts anybody, but why take the chance.
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Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won`t expect it back.
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I like work. It fascinates me. I sit and look at it for hours.
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If you can`t see the bright side of life, polish the dull side.
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Where there`s a will, there are five hundred relatives.
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Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die. |
SiLeO
99+ day(s) ago | I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.
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I couldn`t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
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For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.
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Do you have trouble making up your mind? Well, yes or no?
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If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
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Many people quit looking for work when they find a job.
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When I`m not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded.
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Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don`t have film.
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You know the speed of light, so what`s the speed of dark?
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Join The Army, Visit exotic places, meet strange people, then kill them.
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I poured Spot remover on my dog. Now he`s gone.
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Evening news is where they begin with `Good evening`, and then proceed to tell you why it isn`t.
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Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which you need more.(Friend or Money !)
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There are three sides to any argument: your side, my side and the right side.
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An consultant is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing.
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Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference. |
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