Pandy 2006-10-22 |  | For Cat people |  | Cat Rules
some excerpts
2. FOOD
In order to get the energy to sleep, play, and Hamper, a Cat must eat. Eating, however, is only half the fun. The other half is getting the food. Cats have two ways to obtain food: convincing a human you are starving to death and must be fed *NOW*; and hunting for it oneself. Obviously the latter should be pursued whenever possible. The following are some guidelines for getting fed
# When the humans are eating, make sure you leave the tip of your tail in their dishes when they are not looking.
# Never eat food from your own bowl if you can steal some from the table.
#Occasionally there will be disagreements over what you and the humans will deem as edible. The appropriate action, should the stuff in question be too repulsive to ignore, is to bury it. Scratch at the floor and try to drag over objects to cover the offending item. This informs the ignorant human that it really belongs in the litter box.
GAMES
1. Catch Mouse: The humans would have you believe that those lumps under the covers are their feet and hands. They are lying. They are actually Bed Mice (not to be confused with Bedding Mice, see below), rumoured to be the most delicious of all the mice in the world, though no Cat has ever been able to catch one. Rumour also has it that only the most ferocious attack can stun them long enough for you to dive under the covers to get them. Maybe YOU can be the first to taste the Bed Mouse!
8. Skiing: This game is played when your human has the newspaper lying on the floor for reading. Run down a hallway toward the newspapers at full speed, leap onto the paper and see how far you can slide. The slippery advertisements are best for this. This game is even more fun if your human is unaware that you are going to play. It can be followed by a good round of "Catch Mouse" (newspaper variant). It can also be played on throw rugs.
Edited by Pandy on 2006-10-22 |
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Ragnarok 99+ day(s) ago | hilarious link pandy :P |
Pandy 99+ day(s) ago | You know :P I think that Maraudian would look cute as a button in this get up
http://gizmodo.com/gadgets/animal-abuse/japans-hello-kitty-cat-humiliation-system-282872.php
how about it sugarlumps ? |
GalacticKiller 99+ day(s) ago | hehe, thats great well funny :D, |
{ching} 99+ day(s) ago | LMAO. I think my cat has `thinksheshumansyndrome`. He just sit`s there with my mates all day and doesnt bother even doing cat stuff anymore. If I put cat-food down for him he just looks at me in disgust and expects to have what I`m eating lol. |
MaxHeadRoom 99+ day(s) ago | lol
i got something for you. i`ll sent it to your hotmail email address |
Pandy 99+ day(s) ago | 23. Dresser Drawers: The dressers in a human`s bedroom contain most of their clothes, including many the humans don`t want other humans to see, called "underclothes". Should a dresser drawer be left slightly ajar, you can probably pry it open enough to reach in with a paw in a fishing expedition to see what your claws can snag. If it`s underwear, you can have a great wrestling match with it (and if you have another Cat in the house, with the Cat). Make sure that when you get tired of playing with the underwear you "kill" it and leave the body where your human (and especially any guests) can see it when they come home. Lamps, couches and the top of the stove are good places. Socks, on the other hand, should be "killed" and left in the most remote and difficult to reach spots, like behind couches, under beds, and so on, so that the humans have to hunt for them. You should also only play with one from each pair, to increase the hampering factor of your fun game. |
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