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bipbippy
2008-05-07
  CAT`s DIARY  

Day 983 of my captivity.

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a `good little hunter` I am. Bastards!

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of `allergies.` I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously re-tarded.

The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe.

For now...
bipbippy
99+ day(s) ago
Hey little kitty what`s with all the bite?
EnderWiggin
99+ day(s) ago
Pandy, I`ve sean that.... with the cat named Sparta, right? lol... yeah bips this is funny.... :D
bipbippy
99+ day(s) ago
That kitty looks like the one I used to have. His name was Milo.
Pandy
99+ day(s) ago
You`d like this then, Mean Kitty Song on You tube.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qit3ALTelOo
MirrorUniverse
99+ day(s) ago
This is great! LOL
KatsRule
99+ day(s) ago
Great! Now I won`t feel bad when I copy and paste into my email.

Wait. Is that a fly on the wall? No?? I`ve got to run. It`s the kitty zooms!
Front window, back window, front window, downstairs door, upstairs.
bipbippy
99+ day(s) ago
Yeah this has been making the rounds in my email, so I thought I`d post it. Probably one of the best forwards I`ve ever received.
Pandy
99+ day(s) ago
yeah this is a good one, treg sent this to me a couple of years ago.
Edge
99+ day(s) ago
hmmmm
UberPansy
99+ day(s) ago
brilliant ^.^
Blazed
99+ day(s) ago
lol cute
Deiloche
99+ day(s) ago
Ahahaha nice.

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