jokes jokes jokes

Im all for jokes but baby killing jokes and anything related to harming children as im a father of three greatly offends me and makes me want to kick the living shlt out of anyone who would stoop to such jokes.

* rounds up the guilty and locks them in the stocks while brutally tourturing them with frozen corndogs dipped in turpintine

lmao you got issues Fist

how many babies does it take to shingle a house - depends on how thin you slice then

whats more fun the swinging a baby by its feet - stopping it with a shovel

how do you get 100 babies into a bowl - a blender

how do you get them back out - chips

whats worse then 10 babies nailed to a tree - 1 baby nailed to 10 trees

how do you make a baby stop crawling in circles - take the nail out of its hand

whats blue and yellow and sits at the bottom of a pool - baby with slashed floatys

whats red and yellow and sits @ the top of a pool - slashed baby with floatys

whats black white and red all over and cant go through a revolving door - a nun with a spear through her head

a priest and a rabbi walk down a street, they both see a 5 your old boy. the priest says "id like to screw him" the rabbi says "out of what?"

decided to burn lots of calories today so I set a fat kid on fire!

An indian guy and an Chinese guy cant really work with each other. Indian people like to save every penny, the chinese guy tries to take every penny.
Jewish people are cheap but they will spend the money if they feel the product is good quality.
An indian person would question the cost of the good quality and will be like "i can probably get this made for 5 dollars"
He will rip the material as soon as you look away
"How much is it now? I dont buy ripped shirts"
--Russel Peters ahaha.

The taliban!!!!...Al Qaeda...!!!!!

Honeybucket

2 jews walk into a bar..

..2 weeks later they own it !

LOL@ BIO...thats great....best one yet...love this thread thanks pizza!!

Man is walking round a zoo

He stops to admire the Gorilla in its pen and says to the Zookeeper feeding him `Thats a mighty fine Gorilla`

Zoo Keeper says ` 500$ if you shag the gorilla`

Man says `Ok, but on 3 conditions`

1. No kissing
2. No one must find out
3. I`ll need a few days to get the money together

imagin heaven if this is hell!
A man dies and finds himself in hell. As he is wallowing in despair he has his first meeting with a demon...

Demon: Why so glum, chum?

Guy: What do you think? I`m in hell.

Demon: Hell`s not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here...you a drinkin` man?

Guy: Sure, I love to drink. Love the drinks.

Demon: Well you`re gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays that`s all we do is drink. Whiskey, tequila, vodka, rum, guiness, stella, ...we drink till we throw up and then we drink some more!

Guy: Gee that sounds great.

Demon: You a smoker?

Guy: You better believe it! Love the smoking.

Demon: Alright! You`re gonna love Tuesdays. We get the finest cigars from all over the world and smoke our lungs out. If you get cancer - no biggie - you`re already dead remember?

Guy: Wow...that`s...awesome!

Demon: I bet you like to gamble.

Guy: Why yes as a matter of fact I do. Love the gambling.

Demon: Cause Wednesday you can gamble all you want. crabs, Blackjack, Roulette, Poker, Slots, whatever... If you go Bankrupt...well you`re dead anyhow.

Demon: You into drugs?

Guy: Are you kidding? Love drugs! You don`t mean...

Demon: That`s right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great big bowl of crack. or smack. Smoke a doobie the size of a submarine. You can do all the drugs you want and if ya overdose - that`s right - you`re dead - who cares! O.D.!!

Guy: Yowza! I never realized Hell was such a swingin` place!!

Demon: You homo?

Guy: Uh no.

Demon: Ooooh (grimaces) you`re really gonna hate Fridays.

yea you are right, that would top it haha, i didn`t account for the dead`s, Perhaps a planet with the name of E.0420 can be a forrest =)

would have been even better if it was a Dead planet :)

Not only that the Name of it is unique the planet type fits PERFECT with it haha.

Whoot lucky planet name =)

Name E.6666
Useable land 11
Available ore 431
Mineral Strafez Organism
Planet type Rocky

lmao Anonymous

And so Chuck Nori................................